Holding on

Its been 2 weeks since we lost my Nana. The first week was really hard to deal with the sadness. Everything at school seemed to remind me of her. In my Health Data Content and Structure class we have been talking about types of health care facilities, i.e hospice and such. Of course that made me think of her, started balling in class and had to step out. In my medical terminology class I had to try and keep it together because I sit on the front row and in the middle. Would seriously disrupt the students if I got up and left. My professor for both classes (have the same instructor) emailed me the Monday after it happened to send her condolences of our families lose. She didn't have to but she did. Thought that was super nice of her to show concern for her students.

There were several nights I had a hard time sleeping because I couldn't stop crying and pull myself together. My sweet husband was very nice and would just hold me and let me cry. I think a lot of my sadness stems from not getting the closer I needed, like going to the funeral. The next time I get out that way I will have to make a point to go and see her and get my final good bye. I guess I always knew one day I would have to say goodbye to her, just doesn't make it any easier. Really doesn't

I keep finding myself wanting to pick up the phone can call and check on her. I know that I can and I stop myself. I talked to my Granddaddy last week, just to call and see how he is holding up. Couldn't help but just ball my eyes out after I got off the phone with him. Have you lost a Grandparent? How have you been coping? I haven't been so well these days. I sure hope that I can and soon.

that is all...